Monday, May 29, 2006

i love feeling connected...

emotionally...
mentally...
and...
physically...

and that was saturday night...

yay for being gutsy enough to make that call...

currently listening to the avalanches (so frickin good)
currently reading on the road :: jack kerouac
currently thinking of him...

Friday, May 26, 2006

i hate feeling left out...

its a downward spiral...
when you feel you don't fit in...
you can't think of anything to say...
so you think about how long it was since you did say...
then you're not paying attention...
and they keep on saying...
and you keep on not saying...
...
*sigh*
...
when you thought you left your insecurity at the door...
it rears its ugly face at you...
to keep you in check...
put you in your place...
remind you...

oh by the way...
...
i'm moving to new york...

sleeping by the fyris river :: ane brun

Sunday, May 21, 2006

I eat mangos...

mmmmmmm mango...
in all its deliciousness...
its succulence...
the way the coolness hits my mouth...
sweet on the tongue...
sharp on my wits...
juicy...
a drop glides down my lip...
slowly...
like a dance...
its teasing my senses...
much like a kiss from...
i desire more...
more...
more...
more...
...

why am i never satisfied?

listening to oh well :: fiona apple

Saturday, May 20, 2006

The Hut...

home for the weekend...
a list of sorts...
sorting the hearts...
and the notso hearts...



things i heart:
the way my house smells...
sitting at table 11...
waiting on customers...
my mom...
my dad...
thrifting...
my sister...
catching up...
chopsticks...
broken fortune cookies...
mom's homemade croutons...
reading...
jack kerouac's on the road
buena vista social club...
yoga...
handmade cards...
snail mail to hearts...
hearts far away...

things i heart less:
constant eating...
sleeping in...
by myself...
the number 0...

currently listening to lover's spit :: broken social scene

Friday, May 19, 2006

just friends?...

this blows...
blows chunks....

Thursday, May 18, 2006

he says.....

lisa.....
we shouldn't even try, as his hand leaves the comfort of my own....
my heart beat becomes the only thing i feel....
i lift my head to stare into those eyes.....
silence.....
the words finally being said, after both secretly thinking them...
both knowing them...
... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ...
... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ...
a melancholy sweeps over my face as the quiet surrounds my ears...
nervousness, against my will, clouds my body...
i feel a need to get out...
i'm embarrassed...
i don't want to show him this...
this thoughtfulness...
fidgeting, i search for my belongings...
nothing is left to say...
the night is over...
and so are we...
before there even was a we.

tragically, overly dramatic... as portrayed by miss lily, to the beat of her own drum...to get it out... because as much as she wants to let the tears fall, they just aren't there.

currently listening to parting gift :: fiona apple

Sunday, May 14, 2006

Some Recent Thoughts...

Apparently I used this web log as another way to procreastinate... since the 6th of May, I've had no reason to prooooooooocrastinate... as you are now reading the entries of an Iowa State alum. Am I trying to justify my lack of updating???? Maybe....

Other thoughts:

yoga in the morning = a more productive day
yoga in the afternoon = a less productive day
....
no idea why....

today was a pretty amazing day.
yoga in the morning...
dishes quickly following...
stomping grounds with friends...
the letters of vincent van gogh...
and a dinner party feast of champions:
jonni rahmani hummus and kimberly avocado alfredo pasta...
deeeedeeeelicious...........

today's van gogh words of wisdom....
"when one lives with others and is bound by feelings of affection, then one realizes that one has a reason for living, that one may not be utterly worthless and expendable, but is perhaps good for something."
....
i really like how quickly i turned to reading as my form of entertainment...
TV has not contolled me for about a year... and when i move... wherever i go... i will be the proud owner of a... library....

i just finished david sedaris' holidays on ice...
currently working on the letters of vincent van gogh...
will shortly begin jack kerouac's on the road...
and the lives of the muses: nine women and the artists they inspired...
also in the works... rereading ida b by miss katherine hannigan... because it is THAT good... and reading for the first time... dave eggers' a heartbreaking work of staggering genius...
i heart books...

i am currently loving the lovely, enchanting miss fiona apple... extroidinary machine... and my 008 Beautiful? playlist...

one last note on procrastination...
animal crackers are an excellent device for the aforementioned...
great for snacking and circus reenactments at four in the morning...

Monday, May 01, 2006

May Day May Day!!! Could It Really Be My Birthday?

We grow up so fast...
Another year past...
How do I feel about this one last?


Twins 2002. Veisha 2006

It has been one amazing year.
One filled with many tears and many laughs.
I have grown and matured so much, I don't even know where to begin.
I've broken hearts, mended hearts, met new hearts...
Yah...
Met a lot of new hearts...
Hearts that I am happy to call my friends....
Friends...
Who today threw me a surprise birthday party...
My first ever...
I was sooo embarrassed....
My face was sooo red..
You might've thought I had a glass of wine...
Yah...
Amazing friends...
Amazing.

Currently listening to Death Cab for Cutie's iTunes Original
(just a little birthday love from my twin)