Thursday, February 28, 2008

Wednesday, February 27, 2008

My Math Skillz.

Yoga + the Gotan Project = Happiness

PS. Jane Birkin is awesome to the 10th degree.

Now I'm off to the grocery store.
I am craving some Simply Orange.

xoxo

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

My heart hurts.

...
I am crushing on someone.
And it is a ridiculous crush.
...
The crush... and all the flirting is in and of itself harmless and fun. But it makes me think of attachment. The last guy I got attached to broke my heart. And it all began with flirtatious banter. He still breaks my heart when I sit down and actually think about the demise of us. I don't want to get attached to anyone right now. I'm in such a transient part of my life, willing and desiring to flee on a moment's notice but really too frightened to make such daring moves. So am I really willing? Am I really ready?

Listening to Bon Iver.
Feeling sad.

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Not Lisa Ly

but, Lykke Li :: Little Bit

Love it!
Thanks Jonni.
Love you.

Tuesday, February 19, 2008

List: I dig...

1/ the talking heads.
2/ the talking heads + the arcade fire
3/ holly stalder {Jenny, you will like this}
4/ ...
5/ uhhh fill in the blanks

sidenote:
i have a need to fulfill 5 items in all my lists. this stems from one of my all time favorite movies: high fidelity with john cusack. watch it. such goodness.

Saturday, February 16, 2008

I am lovin this guy...

Bon Iver :: Skinny Love
Myspace // Youtube

and if I lived in any of the following locations... at these dates, I would make my friends in each respective city go with me...

02/22/08 New York, NY - Bowery Ballroom
02/23/08 Brooklyn, NY - Glasslands
03/10/08 Nashville, TN - Exit/In
03/19/08 San Diego, CA - Che Cafe
03/21/08 Santa Barbara, CA - Muddy Waters
03/23/08 San Francisco, CA - The Independent
03/24/08 Portland, OR - Holocene
03/26/08 Seattle, WA - Nectar

then following the show, we could go eat at a sweet lil 24-hour diner, drink coffee or tea, and stay up all night having one of those amazing conversations listening to Skinny Love.

Thursday, February 14, 2008

<3


Happy Valentine's Day.

Wednesday, February 13, 2008

I want...

to cuddle.

Maybe if I was as cute as Kumisolo...

PS. The guy that hit on me a few posts ago came into The Cafe yesterday. He made me anxious and my heart started pounding. It was weird. It is the way I feel when I have anxiety about my ex... but to a much lesser degree. I still get really anxious when it comes to him... my ex that is, even hearing his name. That sucks.

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

The Morning After.

This is funny.
Oh McSweeney's.
You so funny.

Listening to The Format :: The First Single
"You know me,
Oh you think you do you, you just don't seem to see
I've been waiting all this time to be
Something I can't define so let's
Cause a scene
Clap our hands and stomp our feet or something
Yeah something
I've just got to get myself over me
And I hate what I've become..."

I had a dream.
Lin was having "ex" relationship difficulties with Jim Helpert from The Office. (What a sexy man! Glad he's in my dreams at all.) And I was having drinking problems and smoking pot! Such a weird dream. I think it has something to do with Charlie (manager) giving me that free glass of wine at work last night. I almost feel like that could have contributed to my modesty slip-up. As those of you who know me, know I rarely drink and if I do, can drink very little as my tolerance is sooo low.

Guilty Consciences

This very incident sends shudders down my back and in my heart. If only to relieve a slight portion of the guilt I feel, I reveal my thoughts.

Tonight at work, my manager and I were casually talking about Eyeworks, a local optometry practice we both go to. In response to his comment about needing glasses, I mentioned recently going there last week and expecting my new contacts to arrive this week. He mentioned their student discount being a great deal to which I agreed but with slight remorse as I no longer am a student. The deal is almost 50% off! Seriously. Anyway, he noticed my remorse and commented on it. I said I didn't receive the discount for the aforementioned reason. He said why wouldn't you lie? To which I responded with "That would be lying. I'm too moral for that." I'm too moral for that? Ugh, I make myself sick. He responded with something to the degree of "... get off your high horse." I don't exactly recall his wording, but you get the picture.

I am utterly embarrassed! I am sure he was kidding in his remark, as we have a good working relationship, light-hearted and fun. However, his retort speaks volumes to me and calls on something greater to be addressed: my modesty.

Modesty "is most often rendered as humility, shyness, or simplicity," according to this link here. Someone who is modest is
content to interact with others fully cognizant of who they are, functioning within the boundaries of their own capabilities, or limitations with confidence. One who lives and behaves in simplicity quietly performs daily tasks and routines without the trumpet blown before. There is no need to call attention. Modesty acts gently, but with no less perfection or care as one who may constantly announce their deeds.
To claim morality is beyond immodest, clearly making me immodest. Additionally, I find the more one claims to be something, the more likely he or she is actually not. For example, my brother has remarked on my "coffee addiction." I claim to "not be addicted," often retorting with "I don't need my black coffee everyday, I just like it. He cites this as the first sign of addiction: denial. So by claiming morality, I feel I am in fact proving my immorality.

In short, I am a bit shaken by my remark and am at a loss. I will need a couple more days to feel relieved of this mess. For right now, I am meditating on this:

Philippians 2:3
Don't be selfish; don't live to make a good impression on others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourself.

1 Corinthians 4:7
What makes you better than anyone else?

Thursday, February 07, 2008

Happy Chinese New Year!

This is my year.
Year of the Rat.
Let's make it a good one.

Monday, February 04, 2008

Cool things...

1/ Less than $1000 dollars to payoff my loan.
2/ I figured out how to snooze on my cell alarm clock.
3/ After deliberating whether to keep my cell number or go with a new one, I decide to keep it. Thus my ex texts me that night.

PS. #3 is my attempt at sarcasm.

Listening to Eisley.